The past week-and-a-half has been insane. INSANE.....and then some.
We are working on our usual semester "stuff" and also trying very hard to learn the new system, all the ins-and-outs and nooks-n-crannys and just how the whole damn thing works. And I'm tired. And confused. And have a headache.
And losing sleep. Seriously......
Last Friday, I was exhausted, and basically was a zombie all day. The work day FINALLY ended, and once I got hom and had some supper, it was in the jammies and hit the bed early. After sitting up reading for a bit, it was "lights out" and time for a good night's sleep.
That turned out not to be the case.
I woke up about 1-1/2 hours later, WIDE awake. For no good reason. *sigh*
After tossing and turning for about a half-hour, I finally decided it was best to get up before all my restlessness woke up Dear Mr. Dizzy. So me and my Kindle headed out to the living room to do some reading, figuring that would make me drowsy again soon and I could head back to bed.
The next thing I know, it's 5:30 AM. I was STILL wide awake, and had been up reading all night!
*sigh*
My alarm was set for 7:00 AM, so I just went back to bed and kind of lightly dozed on and off until it rang, then got up.
At that point? I was really, really foggy, and felt like I was walking through clouds.
Uh oh, this was NOT going to be good. We had a full day planned, and I was running on basically NO sleep.
I got dressed and headed to the Gym, hoping a bit of physical activity would help get the blood flowing and wake me up a bit. Also, the morning was a bit on the cool side, so that would help. Right? RIGHT?
Nope. Not a chance. *sigh*
So after an extremely brief stint on the elliptical and a few minutes on the recumbent bike, I headed back out. After a quick stop to gas up the Jeep, it was on home to get ready to meet Dad for the Caterpillar Open House.
We got to Cat right as they opened up for the festivities at 11:00 AM, and headed on in. We walked. And walked. And walked some more. Dad was having trouble getting around, so we got a wheelchair and I pushed him around the buildings. And pushed. And pushed some more.
All this with basically NO sleep, remember.....
Once we were finished with the tours, it was 1:30. Dad decided to head on back home, and we made a quick run to the house to freshen up a bit and make it to our NEXT appointment - - our former neighbors' 60th Anniversary Party.
We went there for 2 hours and talked and chatted and visited and had a pretty good time. And somehow - - SOMEHOW - - stayed awake. But I was running out of steam, and fast!
We finally made it back home. *sigh* It felt SO good be be home and able to get all relaxed and comfy! I immediately went to bed and took a 2 hour nap, and once back awake, felt much better.
I usually don't suffer from insomnia. If it ever does happen, it's usually during times of great stress. I can only think that was the cause this time.....last week was TOTALLY horrendous (especially Wednesday, which was HELL).
I'm hoping it starts to slow down a bit soon. Please?
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Sunday, September 09, 2012
Is It Spring Again?
Temps today are in the lower 70's, it is sunny, the sky is a beautiful shade of blue with big puffy clouds floating by, there is a beautiful breeze.....and after getting around 3" of rain in the last week-and-a-half, we have been mowing the past 2 days. The grass has gotten back it's beautiful green color, and growing FAST!
It almost seems like it's May instead of September.....but I am NOT complaining!
Enjoy your Sunday!
It almost seems like it's May instead of September.....but I am NOT complaining!
Enjoy your Sunday!
Saturday, September 08, 2012
Deja Vu All Over Again
This has been a strange, strange day.
First, a bit of background - - I grew up in a small town, and attended a Catholic Grade School. It wasn't a good experience for me, and I do not have many good memories of that place. In fact, I can only think of 1 year (5th Grade) that I could consider a good, happy time. I only went there 7 out of the 8 grades, and then went to the public Junior High for 8th and 9th grades, then on to the public high school.
Seventh Grade was the most difficult year for me. The teacher, Sister Mary Rosalie, was also the Mother Superior for that Convent. She was difficult at best as a teacher. At the first part of the year, she acted okay towards me; actually, she acted TOO okay towards me, to the point where some of the other students started called me a "teacher's pet" and really giving me a hard time. Well, I soon found out why she was acting so favorably towards me - - she (or maybe the voices in her head) had decided that I had "the calling" and she had me targeted for Sisterhood (Nunhood? Whatever the hell you call it).
How did I find this out? Apparently she was talking to my parents. A lot. A LOT. To the point where they were pretty much convinced that maybe there might be something to it.
Finally, my parents said something to ME about it. (Yeah, THANKS Mom and Dad for FINALLY including me in on the conversation) I was shocked, to put it mildly. I was NOT in any way even remotely thinking about that as a life path, not at all! I had NO interest in it! My parents then told me that Sr. Rosalie had apparently been talking to them quite a lot, and had even talked to them about me attending the all-girls Catholic high school in Springfield, and then going on from there to becoming a Novice.
Oh.My.God. No. Just - - NO.
Needless to say, I was scared half out of my mind. Here my parents thought that she had been talking about this with ME, and that I was totally on board with all of this, and that she was talking with THEM on my behalf. WHICH WAS SO TOTALLY NOT THE CASE.
I was so afraid that things had already been planned and put in place, and that I would be forced into going somewhere and doing something I had NO desire to go to or do. It was such a scary time that I just burst into tears. I think THAT is probably what finally made my parents realize just exactly what had been going on, and they were finally able to calm me down by letting me know that if I did not want it, it would not happen that way.
Then they decided to let Sr. Rosalie know. And THAT? Is when the REAL fun started.
Sr. Rosalie changed overnight from treating me as if I were the "golden child" to treating me as if I were something she just scraped off her shoe. She ridiculed me and belittled me in front of the class at any opportunity. She even had the nerve to say one time that I was going to just be nothing but trash and be a product of the streets. (She stopped just short of calling me a whore)
It was hell. Sheer, total HELL.
It got to the point where I would get sick whenever it was time to go to school, but never got sick on the weekends. I would cry for no reason. I had nervous twitches and was jumpy all the time. And I was scared to death to tell my parents, because I was scared to death that it would just make the situation even worse.
But I finally told them. And the met with the Sister. And I don't know exactly what all was said, but when they got home they told me there was nothing to worry about.
And they were right - - kind of. Apparently they had it out with her, big time, and also informed her that I would NOT be attending the school for 8th grade; that they were pulling me out and sending me to the public Junior High a year early.
Sr. Rosalie started just pretty much ignoring me. Which was fine. The school year went pretty much uneventful (at least where she was concerned) except for one or two incidents. But, it was much easier to take it in stride, knowing that I was leaving at the end of the school year and would not have to put up with her much longer.
ANYWAY - - I told THAT story to explain what happened TODAY.....
The Grade School is celebrating their 125th Anniversary, and today was their Open House. Dad called to tell me about it, and I got the distinct impression he wanted me to go with him, since he is sponsoring the 3rd Grade classroom and wanted to meet the teacher.
The last thing I wanted to do was go into that school. For any reason. But it was for my Daddy, so I went. And was actually pleasantly surprised.....
The school has been completely redone inside. And they have TECHNOLOGY. Every classroom has a SmartBoard, a laptop, and Elmo's. They have a computer lab with 17 stations running Windows 7 Professional, and Office 2010. (Yeah, the computer "geek" in me is jumping with joy!) Classrooms are light and airy, with lots of good things to teach the students.
I went through the school, looking at my old classrooms, just amazed at all the changes and up-to-date equipment. Then, while Dad was visiting with the 3rd Grade teacher, I decided it was time. Time to face my old "demons" and go back into my old 7th grade classroom. And even though I know it was many, many years ago, and that my old nemesis is long gone, it took everything inside me to make myself walk in that room. And the whole time I was talking with the 5th Grade teacher (who has that room now) and we were having a good time discussing the technology and all the new things, my nerves were still twitching. That was the room of my worst gradeschool nightmares. And even though everything - and I do mean EVERYTHING - has changed in there, that room still haunted me.
Guess it always will. Because you see, Sr. Rosalie may have been my worst nightmare in that room, but there was another incident that happened in there that only three people know about - - myself, the perpetrator, and one other classmate who came to my "rescue" know about. I never told the teacher (as if she would have done anything about it? Not bloody likely...), and I never told my parents. I have not ever told anyone about it, and even to this day (around 45 years later), I can't. I never see the perpetrator, since he and his family moved right after that school year (thank God!). I still see my "rescuer" now and then at class reunions and such, and we talk about school and even about Sr. Rosalie, but he and I never mention that incident and the part he played in helping me.
Wonder if I will ever be able to let it go? Maybe someday, maybe not. But at least going to the Open House today showed me that time has passed and things are completely different. Maybe that will help me move past this also.
Someday. Maybe.
First, a bit of background - - I grew up in a small town, and attended a Catholic Grade School. It wasn't a good experience for me, and I do not have many good memories of that place. In fact, I can only think of 1 year (5th Grade) that I could consider a good, happy time. I only went there 7 out of the 8 grades, and then went to the public Junior High for 8th and 9th grades, then on to the public high school.
Seventh Grade was the most difficult year for me. The teacher, Sister Mary Rosalie, was also the Mother Superior for that Convent. She was difficult at best as a teacher. At the first part of the year, she acted okay towards me; actually, she acted TOO okay towards me, to the point where some of the other students started called me a "teacher's pet" and really giving me a hard time. Well, I soon found out why she was acting so favorably towards me - - she (or maybe the voices in her head) had decided that I had "the calling" and she had me targeted for Sisterhood (Nunhood? Whatever the hell you call it).
How did I find this out? Apparently she was talking to my parents. A lot. A LOT. To the point where they were pretty much convinced that maybe there might be something to it.
Finally, my parents said something to ME about it. (Yeah, THANKS Mom and Dad for FINALLY including me in on the conversation) I was shocked, to put it mildly. I was NOT in any way even remotely thinking about that as a life path, not at all! I had NO interest in it! My parents then told me that Sr. Rosalie had apparently been talking to them quite a lot, and had even talked to them about me attending the all-girls Catholic high school in Springfield, and then going on from there to becoming a Novice.
Oh.My.God. No. Just - - NO.
Needless to say, I was scared half out of my mind. Here my parents thought that she had been talking about this with ME, and that I was totally on board with all of this, and that she was talking with THEM on my behalf. WHICH WAS SO TOTALLY NOT THE CASE.
I was so afraid that things had already been planned and put in place, and that I would be forced into going somewhere and doing something I had NO desire to go to or do. It was such a scary time that I just burst into tears. I think THAT is probably what finally made my parents realize just exactly what had been going on, and they were finally able to calm me down by letting me know that if I did not want it, it would not happen that way.
Then they decided to let Sr. Rosalie know. And THAT? Is when the REAL fun started.
Sr. Rosalie changed overnight from treating me as if I were the "golden child" to treating me as if I were something she just scraped off her shoe. She ridiculed me and belittled me in front of the class at any opportunity. She even had the nerve to say one time that I was going to just be nothing but trash and be a product of the streets. (She stopped just short of calling me a whore)
It was hell. Sheer, total HELL.
It got to the point where I would get sick whenever it was time to go to school, but never got sick on the weekends. I would cry for no reason. I had nervous twitches and was jumpy all the time. And I was scared to death to tell my parents, because I was scared to death that it would just make the situation even worse.
But I finally told them. And the met with the Sister. And I don't know exactly what all was said, but when they got home they told me there was nothing to worry about.
And they were right - - kind of. Apparently they had it out with her, big time, and also informed her that I would NOT be attending the school for 8th grade; that they were pulling me out and sending me to the public Junior High a year early.
Sr. Rosalie started just pretty much ignoring me. Which was fine. The school year went pretty much uneventful (at least where she was concerned) except for one or two incidents. But, it was much easier to take it in stride, knowing that I was leaving at the end of the school year and would not have to put up with her much longer.
ANYWAY - - I told THAT story to explain what happened TODAY.....
The Grade School is celebrating their 125th Anniversary, and today was their Open House. Dad called to tell me about it, and I got the distinct impression he wanted me to go with him, since he is sponsoring the 3rd Grade classroom and wanted to meet the teacher.
The last thing I wanted to do was go into that school. For any reason. But it was for my Daddy, so I went. And was actually pleasantly surprised.....
The school has been completely redone inside. And they have TECHNOLOGY. Every classroom has a SmartBoard, a laptop, and Elmo's. They have a computer lab with 17 stations running Windows 7 Professional, and Office 2010. (Yeah, the computer "geek" in me is jumping with joy!) Classrooms are light and airy, with lots of good things to teach the students.
I went through the school, looking at my old classrooms, just amazed at all the changes and up-to-date equipment. Then, while Dad was visiting with the 3rd Grade teacher, I decided it was time. Time to face my old "demons" and go back into my old 7th grade classroom. And even though I know it was many, many years ago, and that my old nemesis is long gone, it took everything inside me to make myself walk in that room. And the whole time I was talking with the 5th Grade teacher (who has that room now) and we were having a good time discussing the technology and all the new things, my nerves were still twitching. That was the room of my worst gradeschool nightmares. And even though everything - and I do mean EVERYTHING - has changed in there, that room still haunted me.
Guess it always will. Because you see, Sr. Rosalie may have been my worst nightmare in that room, but there was another incident that happened in there that only three people know about - - myself, the perpetrator, and one other classmate who came to my "rescue" know about. I never told the teacher (as if she would have done anything about it? Not bloody likely...), and I never told my parents. I have not ever told anyone about it, and even to this day (around 45 years later), I can't. I never see the perpetrator, since he and his family moved right after that school year (thank God!). I still see my "rescuer" now and then at class reunions and such, and we talk about school and even about Sr. Rosalie, but he and I never mention that incident and the part he played in helping me.
Wonder if I will ever be able to let it go? Maybe someday, maybe not. But at least going to the Open House today showed me that time has passed and things are completely different. Maybe that will help me move past this also.
Someday. Maybe.
Friday, September 07, 2012
I Knew This Would Happen.....
The beginning of the Fall Semester - - the "Nightmare Semester" - - and my blogging goes to hell in a handbasket.....but I warned you, remember? I DID WARN YOU.
*sigh*
It's been insane.
But it is starting to look like things are settling down, just a tiny little bit. Or maybe I am just so frazzled that I don't even notice it anymore.
Definitely possibility, that.....
But whatever.
In spite of all the insane-ness and crazy-ness and what-all-ness, I am hereby pledging to start blogging again this weekend. And actually continue it on into the following week! Imagine! Crazy talk!
Let's see how it goes.....
*sigh*
It's been insane.
But it is starting to look like things are settling down, just a tiny little bit. Or maybe I am just so frazzled that I don't even notice it anymore.
Definitely possibility, that.....
But whatever.
In spite of all the insane-ness and crazy-ness and what-all-ness, I am hereby pledging to start blogging again this weekend. And actually continue it on into the following week! Imagine! Crazy talk!
Let's see how it goes.....
Saturday, September 01, 2012
Rough, Rough Week
This has been SUCH a rough week, both here at the Dizzy household, and at work. I am so glad it is finally over!
Some of the "highlights" (if they can be considered that):
~ Lost a coworker this weekend. Mary was a dear, sweet lady, who worked tirelessly supporting students with accommodations. She did so much for the College, and will be truly missed. Her son was a student worker of mine many, many years ago, and was a very nice, hard-working young man who has gone on to do great things with his life. I had not seen him for years, but ran into him with his mother late last Spring. He was getting out of the service and was moving to Korea to work and live. He is back in the States for the funeral, and I will be attending the visitation; not just to see him, but to show my support for Mary and her family. It is a sad, sad time for the College at the moment.
~ We are in the process of not only trying to get things going for the Fall Semester, but also in planning the implementation of a new Learning Management System (LMS) for the College. So not only are we having to deal with the daily mess of the Fall "Nightmare" Semester, we are trying to learn the new LMS, and also the Admin (back) side of the LMS. And THEN creating training materials to train faculty on building courses, and for students to learn how to use it. I nightmare of epic proportions, for sure.
~ The drought has taken its toll on our entire property. Trees are suffering, and the grass is brown and "crunchy".....and we have been worried sick about our well and the possibility of running out of water. But this weekend? The remnants of Hurricane Isaac are dumping some welcome, much-needed rain! We have gotten over 2 inches so far, and it looks like we will getting more. Not a drought buster, but still very, very welcome.
Well, time to go back to the sunroom and watch the rain fall. It's SUCH a welcome sight! Thanks, Isaac, for bringing some much-needed moisture to this parched area!
Some of the "highlights" (if they can be considered that):
~ Lost a coworker this weekend. Mary was a dear, sweet lady, who worked tirelessly supporting students with accommodations. She did so much for the College, and will be truly missed. Her son was a student worker of mine many, many years ago, and was a very nice, hard-working young man who has gone on to do great things with his life. I had not seen him for years, but ran into him with his mother late last Spring. He was getting out of the service and was moving to Korea to work and live. He is back in the States for the funeral, and I will be attending the visitation; not just to see him, but to show my support for Mary and her family. It is a sad, sad time for the College at the moment.
~ We are in the process of not only trying to get things going for the Fall Semester, but also in planning the implementation of a new Learning Management System (LMS) for the College. So not only are we having to deal with the daily mess of the Fall "Nightmare" Semester, we are trying to learn the new LMS, and also the Admin (back) side of the LMS. And THEN creating training materials to train faculty on building courses, and for students to learn how to use it. I nightmare of epic proportions, for sure.
~ The drought has taken its toll on our entire property. Trees are suffering, and the grass is brown and "crunchy".....and we have been worried sick about our well and the possibility of running out of water. But this weekend? The remnants of Hurricane Isaac are dumping some welcome, much-needed rain! We have gotten over 2 inches so far, and it looks like we will getting more. Not a drought buster, but still very, very welcome.
Well, time to go back to the sunroom and watch the rain fall. It's SUCH a welcome sight! Thanks, Isaac, for bringing some much-needed moisture to this parched area!
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